Curse

Urcscumug · Mar 09, 2011, 05:35 PM // 17:35

Sometimes I can't help but imagine "extra" dialogues between the characters. What about you?

With me, it goes something like this:

How Nolani Academy really ended:
Rurik: "We make for Kryta and a new life, free of the Charr!"
Rurik: "...Hero? We're leaving. What are you doing there?"
Hero: "Hang on, I'm going through this dead guy's pockets. I found 35 gold pieces!"
Rurik: "What?! I've had men executed for looting corpses on the battlefield!"
Hero: "Aw lighten up, man. Ooh, a purple sword! I'll take this, thank you very much..."
Rurik: "You... you have some filthy habits for a hero, you know that?" (to himself) "...If you weren't so damn useful I would have gotten rid of you long ago..."
Hero: "Hey, can you give me a hand over here? I can't pull this gargoyle's skull all the way out."
Rurik: (disgusted) "What on Balthazar's sword do you need a gargoyle skull for?"
Hero: "I know this guy back in town, he said he'd give me a good shield for this. Or I can sell it to the merchants, those guys buy anything."
Rurik: "Yes, I've often thought about that... I wonder what they do with all the things they buy. Only a small fraction of it ever makes it back on their shelves."
Hero: (grunting) "I bet they sell it to those Canthan people. Nicholas told me he once met a Canthan cook who was crazy about skale fins."
Rurik: (speechless) "..."
Hero: "Yeah, think about THAT next time you gobble up a red bean cake, mate."

ArtemisTheYounger · Mar 09, 2011, 05:52 PM // 17:52

LOL - that's awesome. I wish I was that creative...I'd love to see what other extras you come up with!

cheape arie · Mar 09, 2011, 05:59 PM // 17:59

Haha

I just did that mission.. would be epic to read that!

RedDog91 · Mar 09, 2011, 06:50 PM // 18:50

Player: "Hey Nicholas, why not just sell your gifts and live the rich life?"
Nicholas the Traveler: "I love to travel. There's nowhere that money can take me that my own feet can't."
Player: "Yeah, but theres people paying 5 platinum each, and you're handing out for stuff the merchant only pays 5 gold for."
Nicholas the Traveler: "5 platinum you say? Perhaps I should consider it..."
Player: Yeah, you could finally afford to wash that smelly traveling companion of yours."
------------
(if player has a pet) Nick: "Yakkington doesn't smell any worse than that mut you drag around."
Player: "Touché."
-----------
(if player does not have pet) Yakkingon: "..."
Nick: "Its OK Yakkington! He didn't mean it!"

Urcscumug · Mar 09, 2011, 09:14 PM // 21:14

It's not like ANYBODY in the GW universe takes a bath regularly.

With the odd occasion that a quest makes you stand in a fountain, or you get to walk through a river.

This puts Divinity Coast into a whole new light.

"This is the Eye of Janthir. You will be bringing it to Loamhurst."
"But before it will follow you, you must first cleanse yourself in the Fountain of Truth, up on the hill to the southeast."

The poor guy meant that literally. I was probably making the Eye of Janthir water.

Chrisworld · Mar 09, 2011, 10:59 PM // 22:59

Hahah I enjoyed that

RedDog91 · Mar 09, 2011, 11:15 PM // 23:15

Quote:

Originally Posted by Urcscumug

~snip~

"This is the Eye of Janthir. You will be bringing it to Loamhurst."
~sniff sniff~
"But...uh...go cleanse yourself in that fountain over there first. And hurry!"

Urcscumug · Mar 13, 2011, 10:46 PM // 22:46

Somewhere on the cliffs of Dohjok:
Wolf: "Hello there."
Hero: "Umm, hello."
Wolf: (walks closer nonchalantly) "Lovely weather we're having today, isn't it?"
Hero: "I suppose."
Wolf: "On your way to Grandma, sweetheart? Heh heh..."
Hero: "What? No, I'm actually on my way to..."
Wolf: (gets a weird look in his eyes, comes closer) "Mmmm, love it when you play coy, babe!"
Hero: (unconfortable) "Look, mister, I don't..."
Wolf: (breathing heavily) "Oh you know what it does to me when you do that, you naughty mynx!"
Hero: "Mister, your label's turning red!"
Wolf: "Come here, you!" (makes a grab)
Hero: "OK, that's it."
*SWISH* *THUD*
Hero: "Do I have your attention now? Blink twice if you do."
Hero: "OK, good. What you're feeling against your throat there mister is the steel blade of a 9-41 battle scythe."
Hero: "Now, what that means is that if I move it just a teensy tiny bit it could do a little 9 dmg scratch, or it could do a whoopsie. So stop wiggling."
Wolf: (looks like he wants to say something)
Hero: (eases pressure on the scythe handle)
Wolf: "ithoughtyouwerelittleredridinghood!!!"
Hero: (disgusted) "Look, mister, I dunno who you though I was but I'm no Little Red nothing. I'm a Dervish, a Sunspear Captain on important Sunspear business."
Hero: "And I'm a man btw."
Wolf: (eyes grow wide, tries to say something)
Hero: "What."
Wolf: "butyourewearingaskirt!!11"
Hero: (presses down, teeth clenched) "THIS is not a skirt. THESE are Sunspear ceremonial robes. Blink twelve times fast if you understood that."
Hero: "Did you just blink eleven times? What's that supposed to mean, you mockin' me? You wanna... oh, my bad, it was twelve, I saw it this time."
Hero: "Anyway, mister, you run along now. And I don't wanna find out about you bothering any more little girls from the village, of any color, or I'll be back, you hear?"
Wolf: (gets up slowly and limps away swearing under his breath)
Hero: (shaking head sadly) "I swear to all Gods, ever since I got these robes dyed red I get hit on by the weirdest bastards."

frostkisses · Mar 15, 2011, 01:42 AM // 01:42

lol!!!! thats awesome

` Marshmallow · Mar 15, 2011, 02:45 AM // 02:45

XD lmao !!

need..MOAR