Curse

Mistress Eyahl · Aug 25, 2005, 09:03 PM // 21:03

Has anyone here ever had a relationship with someone they met online, OFFline as well. This doesn't just mean Bf & Gf, it can mean normal friends or close friends, even uh.. adopting.. someone..

Anyway, you get the idea. I know most of us don't like being catogorised as nerds, most of us don't even fall into the sterotypical nerd bucket. We just skim the edge and fall in the gutter beside

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You don't have to be a nerd to enjoy computer games and likewise..
To enjoy making 3D friends via the internet, you don't have to be an anti-social dish cloth with all the personality of a button mushroom.. and the figure of an Orang-U-Tang

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So tell us the gossip, who've you met, how've you met.. why do you stray from the "Can't trust who you speak to over the internet" posse and take a chance on things.

___

I've met three people over the internet.
-The first one was just one internet meeting, then phone calls then a shall we meet. Turned into a three year relationship.
-The second was a lot shorter owing to the non closured state I was in after the ending of the one above. (Was too soon in other words)
-The third was someone who I would call my best friend. 6 months of chatting online and over the phone for ages. Loads in common. (It's very hard for me to come across people in chat rooms I'd get on with. The usual "Hi hr u, asl" just gets them the ignore button) We met, had a relationship that lasted couple of months and then it ended. We still talk and we play MMO's together.
___

Anyway, time to share. May I remind people this isn't a fighting match. If person A wishes to do something person B thinks is insane, then please be open minded enough to say "I wouldn't personally do that" and then move on.
Everyone has the right to live and think how they wish as long as they don't try to force their beliefs or way of life onto anyone else.
I'm saying this cos I have a feeling a lot of "Omg how can you trust them?!" or "You retards, it's only cos you can't get a date in person!!!" will happen.

Try to be mature

Sol Invictus · Aug 25, 2005, 09:06 PM // 21:06

No. Come on, don't be silly.

Mistress Eyahl · Aug 25, 2005, 09:10 PM // 21:10

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sol Invictus

No. Come on, don't be silly.

If you're going to post pointless sentences that have nothing to do with the thread, then don't post at all.
It's called spam, and there's a stick in the corner stamped with the words, "I like to hit spammers".

Sol Invictus · Aug 25, 2005, 09:13 PM // 21:13

Isn't this whole thread just spam?

sidepocket13 · Aug 25, 2005, 09:16 PM // 21:16

i have met multiple people. Dont talk to much at all. although i am marrying one next october! lol

I also have a very close friend that lives in Australia (i am in the states) we met playing Delta Force task force dagger and have been cool ever since. even went down to meet him once last summer

Carboplatin · Aug 25, 2005, 09:16 PM // 21:16

i have had online friendship before. I met a someone who was a friend of a friend on the day before she moved across the country.

I didn't even speak to her that day that i met her. After she got all settled in her new place, we talked 3-4 times a week. I have seen her twice in the past 8 years and we're really good friends, still keeping in touch.

Arcala · Aug 25, 2005, 09:17 PM // 21:17

/thwap SolInvictus

TheArrow · Aug 25, 2005, 09:17 PM // 21:17

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mistress Eyahl

If you're going to post pointless sentences that have nothing to do with the thread, then don't post at all.
It's called spam, and there's a stick in the corner stamped with the words, "I like to hit spammers".

So can I hit you with that stick?

Mistress Eyahl · Aug 25, 2005, 09:18 PM // 21:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sol Invictus

Isn't this whole thread just spam?

Bothering to continue conversing with you would be spam so I'm going to stop after this post.
If you think it's a stupid thread then lodge a complaint about it with a moderator against me and if the moderator wants it closed, it will be closed.

Threads about what you're having for tea, threads about what music you're listening to but according to you, no threads allowed asking if you've met anyone off the internet.

Starting to remember why I left Guru for a break.. so many people with nothing better to do than to ridicule you. Find something of more interest ffs..

Storm Crow · Aug 25, 2005, 09:48 PM // 21:48

You people have problems. she asked a question and most likely wanted a straight answer to it, not rudeness and criticism.

and to answer th question, yes I have. I met him here, Rping in Lyssa's Theater. ownage of teh elite. At first we always were fighting and such, but now we're like so close theres like an ESP thing goin on

.

He recently had to go back to school, and so wont be playing much any more.

That really sucks, having to give up a close friend for 10 months combined with his mother's recent miscarrage, the boy's probably got some serious emotional problems going on at the moment....

midnyte13 · Aug 25, 2005, 09:55 PM // 21:55

met plenty o people but never went beyond the net....too odd for me.....and I am an odd dude ...but ...no would be my answer

Sol Invictus · Aug 25, 2005, 09:55 PM // 21:55

Problems? Hey, I'm not the one with 3 online relationships.

Scaper-X · Aug 25, 2005, 10:23 PM // 22:23

It'd be difficult to count the number of people I've met whom I first encountered online. Attending fan meets does that. I'd say it's in the range of a few dozen. As for people initially met online and then met offline, I have a lasting relationship with about a half dozen, one of whom is my current girlfriend. Cast your uninformed and baseless judgements if you will, they're meaningless to me. We've had more visits than I can readily recall and have a more solid relationship than most traditionally established ones.

Meeting people online affords those involved a most unique interaction. Without physical appearance or other distracting factors, chat allows people to exchange thoughts directly from one brain to the other, bypassing prejudice, naturally-occuring noise (as in distractants), and other factors that impede upon communication. Granted, there can be issues with the fact that flat text can remove emotion from words and meanings can be misinterpretted, but that's more of an issue with the person's ability with diction and expressing him or herself.

I'm sure some if not all of this will be contested, but I've had this discussion many times in the past and am willing to debate it.
-- Scaper-X

Old Dood · Aug 25, 2005, 10:26 PM // 22:26

Sol, The hole you are digging for yourself is getting deeper & deeper. Lighten up. Mistress Eyahl is a nice person, she deserves better then what you are throwing at her.

As for the thread question: I met a Kid online 20+ years ago. It was on a BBS. Most people on this BBS (no different then the internet today) were little jerkwads. However, this kid was different. He had a brain and was using it. I was twice his age. He was 15 at the time. I was 30. It was pretty wierd but, because we both saw eye-to-eye on many things. The kid's Mom was only 10 years older then me. Long story short...He and I are still friends. We are in fact best friends. He watched my kids grow up and now I am watching his kids grow up. Now he makes at least twice the money I make and he became a Super-Nerd-Geek Computer Security Specialist. I stayed as a Hobbist-Nerd. Which is beautiful for me. He can fix my network and all my computers in record time. I in return will give him "Middle-Age-Man" advice.

Mistress Eyahl · Aug 25, 2005, 10:33 PM // 22:33

I've had about 21 boyfriends in my time, I'd say about 7 were serious over the age of 15 relationships.. and from my experience I'd say getting to know someone line is so much easier.

No inhibitions, no shyness. It makes people show their TRUE colours.

In a lot of cases, shy people come out of their shells and show themselves to be really interesting and fun people to be around, and in others it allows people the courage to be rude, arrogant, uncaring and blatently horrible.

I know this is true because where I'm concerned, it's very hard to get to know the real me in person. I throw up a defensive wall because I am just not interested in getting to know someone who says, "You awight, da'hlin? Lovely set of.." I really am not.

If anyone asks me how can I trust these people then I ask them how do they trust their partners? They usually can't answer that with more than a simple "Well.. because I know him". But does anyone know anyone.

My final word to those people is, can you trust that the wonderful guy who buys you flowers, takes you for meals, strolls along in the park with you and treats you like a queen.. is in it for you or what they can eventually get back out of you.
Thing is, when a person logs into a computer to talk to you every day for months on end, with NO word that you two are ever going to meet.. you can be more sure that they're after your personality and conversation.

Typical example - My best friend got told last night by her boyfriend of two and a half years's ex fiancee.. that she is not an ex fiancee. And before you go blaming my mate saying it's her own fault, *I* didn't even suspect what he was doing, and that's not something I'd normally miss. No-one knew he was two timing two girls for nearly three years.

And my mate trusted him. Heh

Thanas · Aug 25, 2005, 10:35 PM // 22:35

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sol Invictus

Problems? Hey, I'm not the one with 3 online relationships.

Hey Sol shut it. If you've nothing to add, don't post!

In reply to the post. I was bored one eve and stuck in the house, so I decided I'd like to talk to someone on AOL or MSN (can't remember). This was before they got rid of random chatrooms. After spending ages getting messaged by women advertising their live shows I was about to leave and had someone start chatting to me whom I believed to be another one of these girls, so I gave her a piece of my mind. She was very offended and effectively told me to sod off and that actually she wasnt advertising live shows and just wanted to chat. I very quickly apologised and we got chatting. Eventually I ended up e-mailing the girl who I initially mistook for a stripper and we carried on e-mailing for a bout 6 months.

There were several reasons I stopped e-mailing her. Firstly I didn't have internet at my house. It was on campus property (I was at uni at the time). When I first started speaking to her, my house was close to campus. However I eventually moved into a new place and ended up being further away. Ah and they also shut down the computer room I visited. This obviously reduced the number of correspondencies between us, but for some reason the urge to keep in contact just fizzled out.

Secondly she started flirting with me and I found this difficult to deal with. She regulary told me she would come to England so we could see each other. She lived in Australia by the way. I found this all very odd at the time.

I think what I'm trying to say here, is that although I enjoyed my correspondancies with the person in question and in some way did care for her, I could never really validate the relationship. It felt strange and somehow lacked sustance. For me I think I need to see the person in question, be in their presence. There is so much you miss when you are a distance. Talking face to face with someone and speaking to them on the end of a telephone line are very different things. When talking to someone face to face you absorb so much more than words. I don't particulary like speaking to people on the phone either. You can't really gauge a persons mood etc when they're on the end of a line. So all in all I'm not really for meeting people online etc. Its not something I'd ever totally discount, mind you, it's just quite unlikely to happen.

Anyway thats my take on it.

Scaper-X · Aug 25, 2005, 10:40 PM // 22:40

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mistress Eyahl

In a lot of cases, shy people come out of their shells and show themselves to be really interesting and fun people to be around, and in others it allows people the courage to be rude, arrogant, uncaring and blatently horrible.

Wholly agreed. Being "limited" to text only allows for a pure stream of thoughts and feelings directly from one brain to those reading. While people can either lie or twist the truth about said thoughts, those that don't are able to show themselves entirely online: their true self.

Pleased to see others chiming in.
-- Scaper-X

Mistress Eyahl · Aug 25, 2005, 10:42 PM // 22:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mistress Eyahl

May I remind people this isn't a fighting match. If person A wishes to do something person B thinks is insane, then please be open minded enough to say "I wouldn't personally do that" and then move on.
Everyone has the right to live and think how they wish as long as they don't try to force their beliefs or way of life onto anyone else.
I'm saying this cos I have a feeling a lot of "Omg how can you trust them?!" or "You retards, it's only cos you can't get a date in person!!!" will happen.

Try to be mature

Did you miss this part of my post, Sol? You're very childish and extremely rude and you obviously have trouble abiding by simple forum rules.

All your posts in this thread have been flames at me, and I'm surprised I'm so effing calm about what you've said to me.

There's no need to threaten you with reporting or anything though, cos you're just showing what sort of a person you can be. And it's a very poor one. I pity you.

P.s.. before you post anything in retaliation about "Needing to go online to get a boyfriend" I'll just tell you this.

Restricting yourself to typing and phone calls and maybe a few pictures, is an EXTREMELY hard way to have a relationship meaning... not a lot of people can do it.
Think about it. Your personality, has to be so fruitfull, so magnetic, so bubbly.. that someone wants to just TALK to you, for hours.. and hours.. and hours.
I'm very sorry, but if that by itSELF is anything to be ashamed of then, well.. I'm guilty of having a good personality

Crimson_1190 · Aug 25, 2005, 10:45 PM // 22:45

Well, I have known two friends i have met on the internet...even as i read the post one of them signed on. I have known them since the starcraft days probably 7-8 yrs now. Which is odd in a way because very little truly interests me in people to keep talking to them long enough...not that I find people boring, just that friendships come and go with me rather quickly out of just apathy. But for some odd reason I still talk to them, I even met one on a coincidental trip to Arizona. The internet does make people show their true colours though, because they need not fear reprisal...or the good old kick in the face!!! As I say, it is odd i still speak to one in particular, she and I have nothing really at all in common, no common interests, no favorite bands, games, hobbies, majors, reading material, personallity traits in common. Nothing what so ever....odd

Detis Zan · Aug 25, 2005, 10:47 PM // 22:47

Quote:

Originally Posted by Storm Crow

You people have problems. she asked a question and most likely wanted a straight answer to it, not rudeness and criticism.

and to answer th question, yes I have. I met him here, Rping in Lyssa's Theater. ownage of teh elite. At first we always were fighting and such, but now we're like so close theres like an ESP thing goin on

.

He recently had to go back to school, and so wont be playing much any more.

That really sucks, having to give up a close friend for 10 months combined with his mother's recent miscarrage, the boy's probably got some serious emotional problems going on at the moment....

Heya storm I've been seeing ya a lot and if ya wanted to say hey just give me a PM (You are a nice person in my threads of course. ^^; )

Anyway on topic I've had a lot of friends some best friends, some crushes on. But I've met my now fiance online.

Story Alert-
On AOHell I wanted to RP one night in a chat room. But nothing was up in 3 in the morning. But then I saw a chat room looking for an applicator for Role Play group. so I Decided to jump in. At first I thought it was a dead room but that was when I met Red-Sama one of the moderaters of Elemental Soul (A descriptive Role-Play group with a SL simular to the Secret of Mana series yet different also.) So I looked through the site he gave me and I said I'll try to apply for it. so a day went by and I get invited to a chat room and There was Red-Sama his 'fiance' the Leader and then Kasa another resent moderator. So we all talked in the RP Q&A or just usual talk. And I got a long with them. Later on me and Kasa talked more and more and then we got closer more..

Side Note- I've had a close relationship before and had it go bad. So I had experience in Online relationships..

And then finally it came to love and we finally met each other. ^^ She lives in Montanna while I lived in Colorado. So we didn't to see eachother a lot. until recently we decided to get engaged and now I'm living with her in Montanna. ^^ We haven't been together long (nearly a year now) but we're happy together.. True love you can say. ^^; Just gotta be opened minded that's all.

Unfortunately she can't review my App when I finally (the RolePlay ran into issues..) turn it in. I geuss there's disadvantages when "you sleep your way to the top." XD Inside joke.