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Old May 02, 2007, 12:36 PM // 12:36   #61
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I can conceive of nothing, in religion, science or philosophy that is more than the proper thing to wear, for a while.
~Charles Forte

It's amazing how many people don't know their own nature, even though they can't do anything with it until they know what it is. How can you move toward joy if you don't know what makes you happy? <...> Nobody's required to live in pain. We should always try to move toward joy.
~Sheri S. Tepper in Six Moon Dance

For my third quote, I request everybody read either Joseph Heller's Catch 22, or Tom Stoppard's Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead. Partial credit if you only watch the movies, extra credit if you also read Edward Albee's "Zoo Story".
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Old May 02, 2007, 11:59 PM // 23:59   #62
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AetherBunny
For my third quote, I request everybody read either Joseph Heller's Catch 22, or Tom Stoppard's Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead.
I second the Stoppard request, a brilliant, witty and inteligent play. The movie's quite good as well.

Here are some of my favourites:

"There was only one guy in the whole Bible Jesus ever personally promised a place with him in Paradise. Not Peter, not Paul, not any of those guys. He was a convicted thief, being executed. So don’t knock the guys on death row. Maybe they know something you don’t."
- Neil Gaiman, American Gods

"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away."
- Philip K. Dick

"At that time there were many blank spaces on the earth, and when I saw one that looked particularly inviting on a map (but they all look that) I would put my finger on it and say, 'When I grow up I will go there.'"
- Joseph Conrad, Heart of Darkness (I'm sentimental like that)

Gentlemen, you can't fight in here, this is the War Room!
- Dr. Strangelove

"Gunner: Anyone that runs, is a VC. Anyone that stands still, is a well-disciplined VC! You guys oughta do a story about me sometime!
Joker: Why should we do a story about you?
Gunner: 'Cuz I'm so f***in' good! I done got me 157 dead gooks killed. Plus 50 water buffalo too! Them's all confirmed!
Joker: Any women or children?
Gunner: Sometimes!
Joker: How can you shoot women or children?
Gunner: Easy! Ya just don't lead 'em so much! Ain't war hell?"
- Full Metal Jacket

Do you know what the chain of command is here? It's the chain I go get and beat you with to show you who's in command.
- Firefly, episode 3 (probably): The Train Job
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Old May 08, 2007, 03:12 AM // 03:12   #63
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Best Family Guy Quote ever!

Peter: Hey hey I got an idea. Lets play "I Never." You got to drink if you did the thing that the person says they never did.
Cleveland: Oh I got one, I never slept with a women with the lights on.
(They all drink.)
Joe: I'll go next, uh I never had sex with Cleveland's wife.
(Quagmire and Cleveland drink.)
Peter: alright lets see uh, I never did a chick in a Logan airport bathroom.
(Only Quagmire drinks.)
****About 33 drinks later****
Peter: God lets see what else is there um...I never gave a reach-around to a spider monkey while reciting the Pledge of Alligence.
Quagmire: Oh God.
(Quagmire takes a drink.)
Joe: I uh I never picked up an illegal alien at Home Depot to take home a choke me while I touch myself.
Quagmire: Oh come on!
(Quagmire drinks again.)
Peter: I never did the same thing except with someone from Joann Fabrics.
Quagmire: Oh God this is ridiculous. You guys suck! (Drinks more and passes out.)

---------------------------------------

An awesome Spaceballs quote

Dark Helmet: [as seeing the Eagle 5 go off with its Hyper Jets] Wait!
[raises his mask up]
Dark Helmet: What happened? Where are they?
Colonel Sandurz: I do'nt know sir. They must have hyper jets on that thing.
Dark Helmet: And what do we have on this thing? A Cuisinart?
Colonel Sandurz: No, sir.
Dark Helmet: Well, find them, catch them!
Colonel Sandurz: Yes, sir.
[picks up the intercom]
Colonel Sandurz: Prepair ship for light speed.
Dark Helmet: No, no, no. Light speed is too slow.
Colonel Sandurz: Light speed is too slow?
Dark Helmet: Yes. We're gonna have go right to... ludicrous speed.
[everybody gasps]
Colonel Sandurz: Ludicrous speed? Sir, we've never gone that fast before. I do'nt know if this ship can take it.
Dark Helmet: What's the matter Colonel Sandurz? Chicken?
Colonel Sandurz: [Wimpering] Prepair ship!
[Calms down]
Colonel Sandurz: Prepair ship, for Ludicrous speed. Fasten all seat belts.
[everybody fastens in their seat belts and locks all of the doors]
Colonel Sandurz: Seal all enterances and exits. Lock all stores in the mall. Cancel the 3-ring circus. Secure all animals in the zoo...
Dark Helmet: [Takes the intercom from Sandurz] Gimme that, you petty excuse for an officer!
[speaks into the intercom as Sandurz puts on his seat belt]
Dark Helmet: Now hear this, Ludicrous speed...
Colonel Sandurz: [Interrupts] Sir, you better buckle up.
Dark Helmet: [to Sandurz] Ah, buckle this.
[Into the intercom]
Dark Helmet: Ludicrous speed, go!
[Spaceball 1 begins to go so fast that Helmet is hanging on the ledge and is screaming as Spaceball 1 goes from light speed to ridiculous speed and then to ludicrous speed]
Dark Helmet: What have I done? My brains... are going into my feet.
[the sceneoutside changes from straight lines to some kind of Plad color and sails over the Eagle 5]
Barf: what the hell was that?
Lone Starr: Spaceball 1.
Barf: They've gone to plaid.
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Old May 08, 2007, 08:55 AM // 08:55   #64
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Today I misread something; and thus the quote:
'Your rectum is so stretched that shit falls out when you talk.'
was born.

Sometimes randomly generated spam is epic:
'My Friend, You are in Trouble - We offer INSTANT DOWNLOAD!'

We had this lvl12 in our group doing one of the southern shiver peaks missions. Every 5 seconds he would say 'remember I need to cap th elite'. Closing to the end of the mission he said 'do you cap Barrage here?' Another team mate said:
'The wiki is your friend.'
'Silence is golden.'

Last edited by MAnderson; May 08, 2007 at 08:58 AM // 08:58..
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Old May 08, 2007, 12:13 PM // 12:13   #65
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Tonight, We Dine In Hell!!!
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Old May 08, 2007, 02:36 PM // 14:36   #66
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Woah! Transvestite! Back off!
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Old May 08, 2007, 03:52 PM // 15:52   #67
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"Look at me, look at me...........Pro."

"Don't be a fool and wrap your tool."

" We'll be accepting donations in the form of cash, visa, and full frontal nudity"

"Dinner for two. Clothing optional."

"You shouldn't take life to seriously. You'll never get out alive. "

Quotes from Van Wilder
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Old May 08, 2007, 05:59 PM // 17:59   #68
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"I don't need help from you Zeus" Kratos from GoW II
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Old May 13, 2007, 03:10 AM // 03:10   #69
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These may not be exactly worded correctly...

Tom Tucker: "Well, I'm sure you're all with me when I say congratulations, you son of a b*tch."

Obi-Wan Kenobi: "Who's the greater fool? The fool, or the fool who follows him?"

Chad Vader: "No, a bicycle. I lost control, fell off an embankment...down a hill, into a volcanoe."
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Old May 15, 2007, 08:45 AM // 08:45   #70
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"I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die." -Mr. Garrison, South Park the Movie.

"Success in Iraq is not no violence." - Dubya, explaining what defines victory in Iraq.

"Knock knock at your front door. It's the suede denim secret police! They have come for your uncool niece." - Dead Kennedys, California Uber Alles.

"We ain't going to the party, we ain't going to the game, we ain't going to the disco, we're gonna steal people's mail!" - Dead Kennedys, Stealing People's Mail.
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Old May 16, 2007, 11:46 AM // 11:46   #71
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i have two favourite quotes

"why is abbrevation such a long word" and " there r no stupid questions just alot of inquisitive idiots"
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Old May 17, 2007, 01:49 PM // 13:49   #72
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Government Flu

"Knock knock at your front door. It's the suede denim secret police! They have come for your uncool niece." - Dead Kennedys, California Uber Alles.
[/I]
Ah, well, if we're quoting DK...

You go to work today
You'll go to work tomorrow
Shitfaced tonight
You'll brag about it for months

Remember what I did
Remember what I was
Back on Halloween

But what's in between
Where are your ideas
You sit around and dream
For next Halloween

Why not everyday
Are you so afraid
What will people say
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Old May 29, 2007, 03:27 AM // 03:27   #73
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you cant say yaoi without owie (its an anime thing)

last two is tied...

How can we have a Y2K problem in a country with both Microsoft and Intel?
- Al Gore

More and more of our imports come from overseas.
- George W. Bush
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Old May 29, 2007, 06:08 AM // 06:08   #74
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"It ain't about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit".

I think that's how it went, Rocky ftw!
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Old May 29, 2007, 04:32 PM // 16:32   #75
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"it's not murder if you say yes"
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Old May 29, 2007, 11:44 PM // 23:44   #76
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Well I'm rather bored, so I will throw out three more.

1) "A failure will always be a failure, that fact can never change."

2) "Absolute trust is the strongest bond."

3) "I live my life by the seven golden rules: Greed, lust, sloth, gluttony, envy, anger, and wrath."
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Old May 31, 2007, 10:32 AM // 10:32   #77
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No one makes me bleed my own blood

- Ben Stiller, Dodgeball (idk if this was taken alrdy, didnt look, but its awesome quote)
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Old Jun 03, 2007, 01:44 PM // 13:44   #78
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I Think Therefore I Am-Descartes
The latin is: Corgito Ergo Sum
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Old Jun 03, 2007, 02:04 PM // 14:04   #79
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lacasner
Best Quote ever from Anchorman:

"60% of the time...it works every time!"

This one's even better

"Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale's vagina. "
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Old Jun 03, 2007, 02:43 PM // 14:43   #80
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Quote:
Originally Posted by murtagh deadmoon
I Think Therefore I Am-Descartes
The latin is: Corgito Ergo Sum
Je pense, donc je suis
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