I'll point out some of the obvious mistakes, but let me first suggest that you start off by copying builds out of observer mode rather than make your own. This build in general isn't really salvageable.
1) None of your characters are capable of operating in a split situation. Most builds have at least a warrior with mending touch and a burning arrows ranger to deal with that sort of thing, or something equivalently effective.
2) Your flag runner: Signet of rejuvanation doesn't trigger the condition when you're casting on youreslf, which a flag runner will be. Also, while water trident is a good elite consider running ether prodigy or second wind (better) for more blind/hp spam.
3) Your monks. They won't work at all. Go look up some monk builds. If you want an aegis chain, /E is pretty ok for glyph of lesser, but there are better ways of countering melee these days (ice), and it would free your monks up to take a better secondary.
Besides these common mistakes, the build in general won't work. Focusing on knockdowns in your build is very unwise, especially since many teams run ward of stability, or run Mo/W's who can't be knocked down most of the time. Even as a build that focuses on knockdowns, none of your characters skillbars are very effective. You should spend time on observer mode to see how matches play out, even if you don't want to copy builds, just so you can see what roles will be required of a build.
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