Curse

Shakkara · Dec 12, 2007, 01:36 PM // 13:36

Programmer.

And of course snatch the sourcecode

Nah, I think I'll just be gamedesigner. Improve chest drops and remove loot scaling. Revert the -2 damage on shields and Knights, so it once again counts for all damage, not just physical. And maybe add in a few more item mods, inscriptions and insignia, such as -2 damage / +45 health when affected by shout/chant on shields, etc.

I'd totally and utterly overhaul most paragon skills and look into mesmers too if there was time left.

Vazze · Dec 12, 2007, 01:38 PM // 13:38

I would make the game subscription based. The extra funding would be used to fine tune game elements and ensure that broken parts are IMMEDIATELY removed/fixed, not just after a year like now (or worse, never...).

Sjeng · Dec 12, 2007, 02:18 PM // 14:18

I'd pimp my account with a gazillion ecto's en gold =D

I'd be the Big Cheese, and order the team to:

- add extra storage tabs, or just increase the tabs from 20 to 50 slots.
- add armor storage
- add dye storage
- add key storage
- add guild storage
- add a Event Hat NPC that stays for 1 week after each finale event to hand out hats to people that missed the finale, in exchange for doing some themed quests.
- add new Halloween/Wintersday quests
- make my wintersday contest hat the winning entry ^^
- increase stacks from 250 to 2000
- add 2 extra character slots for GW:EN
- add more stuff to the online store worth buying, such as Charr Slippers.
- remove the anti-farming code, so loot-scaling won't be a problem anymore.
- remove the timer on soul-reaping
- give pets corpses again
- make runes and insignia's stackable and set a fixed price for insignia's
- let the free chests/treasures give good and gold drops every time, and no more grapes/decreased gold. I mean c'mon, you can only use em once a month!
- add new armor to EotN for all professions except warrior, to compensate for Silver Eagle armor, and NO MORE RESKINS!
- fix armor clipping issues and "ugly" armor bugs
- have tournament tokens give you 1k balthazar faction when used, with a fixed market value of 500g.
- make engame greens acceptable to the HoM
- add guild hall customization options to the guild lord, such as holiday decorations, a fireworks master, day/night cycle, pub with bartender that sells all sorts of ale...
- perform CPR on the Monastery Scribe.
- ban all the bot farmers/spammers/online gold sellers.
- ban all hackers!
- buy more cookies for themselves, for making a great game!
- Make GW2 even better! w00t! And send a free copy to me =D

hm... did I forget anything?

ah yes: add guildroster tabs for all the guilds in an alliance.

Ninian_Grace · Dec 12, 2007, 02:43 PM // 14:43

play/tester.

then I could tell them whats going wrong with the numerous bugs and hopefully slide in a couple ideas for the game.

Mordakai · Dec 12, 2007, 03:51 PM // 15:51

I'd find out what the new Professions for Utopia were going to be a post them on the internet....

and then get fired.

Cebe · Dec 12, 2007, 04:04 PM // 16:04

I'd siphon money off to GWG on the sly.

Balan Makki · Dec 12, 2007, 04:08 PM // 16:08

I'd put Riddlin in the coffee maker then convince everyone that Guild Wars really needs is an "I Win" button.

wilebill · Dec 12, 2007, 04:24 PM // 16:24

Summon them all into a large conference room, then announce that there would be no more doughnuts until they supplemented the present wimp weapons with really good weapons. Some new weapons too. Paragons get assault rifles, Assassins get heavy Sniper Rifles with a scope! If necessary I would threaten to take away the pizza as well!

Orange Milk · Dec 12, 2007, 04:32 PM // 16:32

I'd ban everyone who begs for gold in any chat for a week for being lazy, stupid, and annoying.

I'd increase the amount of people you can put on "ignor"

add in some code so that when you move a "stack" of anything from storage to inventory or viceversa the window pops up that asks how many you would like to move, like when you trade.

ensoriki · Dec 12, 2007, 04:33 PM // 16:33

Guns are pretty damn wimpy Wilebill
you sure you don't prefer a cat launcher?

absolutcrobi · Dec 12, 2007, 04:52 PM // 16:52

remove the soul reaping timer.
add a hairstyle changer
MORE hairstyles
and make pve and pvp seperate but equal skill wise
and more/better colorable areas for armour.

Yakumo · Dec 12, 2007, 04:58 PM // 16:58

I'll be the CEO.

I'll set all A-Net staff the task to get the equipment I need to have my PvE toons PvP ready.

They'll have an hour to get all their toons suited and booted (for farming, chest running, whatever).

Once the hour is up, all gold, inventory, and storage is emptied.

They'll each be given 5k and a shopping list consisting of greens, golds, collector items, crafter items, and mods I want.

How they get these is up to them, but no trading between themselves.

In addition, they will have to spend at least an hour in the following activities:

1. Farm greens
2. Farm gold
3. Farm for gold items (any as long as they are of the required weapon type)
4. Farm for mods/inscriptions
5. Farm for collectables/material
6. Chest run
7. Spam WTB <whatever>

No one leaves until I get what I want. All coffee is free. A swear box will be provided whereby the donations gladly received will go straight into my pockets.

As any good boss, I would like to motivate my team, so their Xmas bonus will rest upon the completion of the task, and their ability to tell me afterwards that they had fun.

Stolen Souls · Dec 12, 2007, 05:04 PM // 17:04

I'd wanna be teh guild leeder of ANET.

I'd:

-flick the server switch on and off repeatedly.

-reset the cost of ectos and rare mats. Then when everyone was hyped up, I'd do a full rollback
-rearrange monster types and spawn locations. Titans on Shing Jea island? I think SO!
-go to Presearing Ascalon as a GM and ban everyone that deserves it (80% of everyone there)

Then I'd:

-Reset Elonian Treasure chests
-Nerf Ursan Blessing
-Remove the buff from GW:EN

Have fun. ^_^

Fluffiliscious · Dec 12, 2007, 06:00 PM // 18:00

I'd make everyone's chars into a new race...Pickle Weasels! Mwahaha...head of a pickle, body of a weasel. Then, when you got a DP, your head would get rubbery and droopy like cheap pickles. Instead of monster wielding weapons for melee or casting, they would try to sandwich your head on a cheeseburger and eat it. Oh what fun that would be!

upier · Dec 12, 2007, 06:38 PM // 18:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yosh

Save Togo.

That's it.

I'd actually demand from the programmers to make it possible for players to attack and kill the NPCs we need to protect and follow around!
I dare you to get stuck again Joko/Mhenlo/Danika/Togo/...
Bastards ....

So since all of A.Net would be busy doing that - I'd rush into accounting and say that my daughter is being held hostage and if I don't transfer 2 million bucks to a certain account by the end of the day - they'd kill her!
1. Scenario 1 - they transfer the money, I quit GW and buy myself a PS3.
2. Scenario 2 - they let my "daughter die" and WE have the confirmation that A.Net are indeed EVIL!11

A win-win situation I tell you!

ElinoraNeSangre · Dec 12, 2007, 07:02 PM // 19:02

Level designer (and I confess I've been tempted to make a stab at applying for one) or a tester because I'm a tester anyway. I've been doing it for over 8 years so I'm pretty decent at it by now.

Then again, I could not probably get a lot done in a day.

I know as a tester, a day is barely enough to learn what you should be testing, much less write a test plan, dig into the code to figure out what it should be doing, write test cases, any other number of crazy stuff testers have to do (and I do a lot of planning in my current test role, a lot of coordiating stuff, so then my approaches tend towards working really closely with the team and knowing their strengths so there's always that, and all kinds of crazy stuff...).

But it would probably be enough for me to poke at it with finding bugs in mind.

Community relations would probably be fun as well, I'm pretty patient when I want to be, and I like working with people where I can. I've got to do some fun customer stuff in my current job (chats, working with people on newsgroups, meeting with my product's users at events, lots of fun stuff).

Bah, someone would actually remove a couple of the most hot looking professions in the game and THEN design hot armors for what's left? I think not! I think there'd be riots if paragons and rits didn't get more hot armors because they're gone.

(then again, I <3 EotN armors, so what do I know, I'm just a dumb software tester with a big can of energy drink today...)

And I'd make the entire staff eat my awesome fudgy brownies of chocolate death with frosting on top.

prism2525 · Dec 12, 2007, 08:32 PM // 20:32

Separate PvE and PvP....FOREVER!!!
Peek into the GW2 story
get myself a free copy of every coming item related to GW
WRITE some quests myself, the cynn+mhenlo or koss+melonni kind

Finally, make an EPIC quest to finally kick the damn charr outta my house!!! Me and Gwen shooting them down with Spontaneous Combustion

EDIT: oh, and also learn the secret why there are no 20 energy spells in the game.

You can't see me · Dec 12, 2007, 08:35 PM // 20:35

PIC

Programmer in Cheif.

I would...

~Remove the Zaishen Chest
~Create the Tormented Armor Set
~Make Chaos Gloves actually look nice with armor sets, especially on the warrior
~Create a new Set of Assasin FoW
~Create a new mini mission: "Kill Alesia"
~Redesign the Eye of the North Armor Sets
~Give tournament tokens a use in PvP, IE, double faction scrolls at cost of tokens
~Remove all blessings
~Engineer a few new rares, most being caster items. We need more rare caster items.

Ork Pride · Dec 12, 2007, 08:36 PM // 20:36

I'd be the guy who fires the guy who though of "loot scaling."

Martin Firestorm · Dec 12, 2007, 08:37 PM // 20:37

$$$$$owner$$$$$